Day 184: stuck on you

June 5th, 2018. Bedtime.

Me: [turning over onto my right side]: Good night.

La Bonavita [putting his arm around me, which produces a slight rustling sound]: What is this?

Me: [mumbling sleepily]: What’s what?

La Bonavita [rummaging under my shirt]: there’s some paper or something stuck to you.

Me [squirming]: no there’s not! Stop it, I’m trying to go to sleep!

[sound of band-aid being ripped off]

Me [sitting up angrily]: What are you doing? What is that?

La Bonavita [peering at a small piece of paper in the dark]: Why did you have your I voted sticker stuck to your boob?

Me [relaxing and turning back over]: Oh, I think I just put my shirt on inside out, it must have gotten stuck to me.

La Bonavita [perplexed]: Yeah, but didn’t you feel it on your skin? How could you fall asleep with that sticker stuck on you like that?

Me [sleepily]: I don’t know, it wasn’t bothering me.

La Bonavita [muttering]: You are just all mind, that’s why. You have no sensation in your body.

Me [smugly]: No, it’s actually the opposite: I’m very sensuous and a true patriot. So I need skin-to-skin contact with my I voted sticker.

La Bonavita: Uh-huh.

I fall asleep to the soothing sounds of La Bonavita harrumphing to himself.

Standard